Etiquette School of Ohio

Driving Etiquette - Stopping In Right-Of-Ways

I understand the need to drop a passenger off at the door, unload or load your vehicle, ask for directions, or communicate with the driver of another vehicle. What I don’t understand is why people do these things in the middle of a road or driveway. Do people who do this realize they are making other people wait for them causing traffic backups?

Today, while I was driving from one appointment to another, it seemed the majority of these traffic blocking citizens were out in force.

I was waiting at a stop light. When the light turned green, the line of cars did not move. The light cycled again and still the line of cars did not move. I assumed there was either a traffic accident or a disabled vehicle ahead. When I was able to get a clear view, it was a man who left his car to walk to the one in front of him to ask for directions. What happened to pulling into a nearby service station to ask for directions?

In another incident, I was waiting at a crosswalk for a pedestrian. No problem. But after the pedestrian had safely crossed, the car ahead of me did not move. The driver and passenger were having a conversation. Eventually, the passenger got out of the car which was still in the middle of the road, and walked to a nearby building. I wondered if the driver had ever heard of the side of the road. It would be much safer for the passenger exiting the car and would not have blocked traffic up into the intersection.

As the population continues to increase in our country, we have to be aware of how are actions effect others. I am very concerned about the “It’s all about me”, attitude of people. Such an attitude has nothing to do with making this a better world to live in. Such an attitude doesn’t even come close to the concept of living green. Think of the gas waisted in both of the incidents I told you about today.

Always remember, no matter where you are or what you are doing, there is a reaction to every action. The principles of etiquette help to emphasize the positive to make this a better place in which to live. Please be considerate of others and think about how your actions are effecting others.

Giving Compliments

When giving a compliment, it is important to be sincere. Try to be specific to what you are complimenting. “Great job!”, may be sincere, but, “You did a great job presenting the financial report!”, gives an understanding to what someone did well.

There’s an old saying, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything.” But be careful not to make something nice up - just to say something.

Compliment Fishing

It is impolite to fish, search, or ask for compliments.

Compliments should only be given when the person giving the compliments feels they are justly deserved.

How To Graciously Accept A Compliment

It is most important to receive a compliment graciously. Often people are too modest when receiving a compliment. However, rejecting a compliment is also rude because you are basically questioning the judgment of the person who gave the compliment.

If you receive a compliment, simply say, “Thank you”.

If you receive a compliment for something others have also contributed to, be sure to acknowledge their input.

Never accept a compliment for something you have not done.

How To Hold Or Carry Gloves

The subject matter of my posts often come from recent experiences in my life. This is how I selected today’s topic, “How To Hold Or Carry Gloves”.

I am performing in a local community theater production and the chorus girls are required to wear gloves. During one of the musical numbers, they must take the gloves off and carry them. Of course, I was quick to share the proper etiquette for carrying gloves with the showgirls and would like to share this etiquette lesson with you as well. Even though we infrequently wear gloves in a social setting anymore, we do wear them in cold weather and the same rules do apply.

When carrying or holding gloves, hold them by the fingers. This keeps the visual image very neat and organized. If you were to hold them at the wrist end, the fingers would be flapping and look sloppy.

Did you know there is a glove flirtation code? For example, if a lady drops one glove, she is saying yes. If she drops both gloves, it means, “I love you”.  Don’t jump to any conclusions too quickly.  In today’s world, she may have very well dropped the glove because her hands were full.

Perhaps for fun, I’ll share the entire code with you in a future post.

Business Networking - Speak With Everyone

When attending a networking function, don’t overlook anyone and try to speak with everyone - even if it’s very brief.

Others will remember your kindness and your willingness to make them feel comfortable and included and will want to return the favor.

This is an excellent way to begin building business relationships and increase the size of your network.

Engagement “Congratulations”

It is improper to “congratulate” someone on their recent engagement.  By saying, “Congratulations!”, you are inferring you thought they might never find a mate and are therefore insulting them.

When someone announces their engagement, you might want to say, “That’s great!”, “I’m so happy for you!”, “You both make such a wonderful couple!”, or “That’s wonderful news!”.

Also, please do not ask if you’re invited to the wedding.  Doing so places the engaged couple in an uncomfortable situation and is therefore rude.  Wait for an invitation to find out.

Dining Posture

Proper posture is essential when dining.

Sit with a straight back.  Lean forward from your hips ever so slightly as you bring your food from your plate to your mouth.

Do not round the back or bring your head down toward the plate to “shovel” your food in to your mouth.  The food should come to you.

Also, do not sit in your chair as if you were lounging.  Doing so is a guarantee to have food land in your lap.

Where Is Your Bread Plate And Water Glass?

It is not uncommon to see place settings very close together in an effort to seat as many people at one table as possible.  This is not the appropriate manner in which to set a table, but when we encounter this type of setting, we must know which bread plate and water glass is our own.

An easy way to remember where your settings are is to think of the luxury BMW car.

While sitting at the table read the BMW left to right as you normally read.  The letters stand for the following:

B - Bread plate

M - Meal or main plate

W - Water

You will never have to guess again!

Wedding Etiquette - Flowers - Groom’s Boutonniere

Traditionally, a bride would remove one flower from her bouquet and pin it to her groom’s lapel as a symbol of her love.

Today, when the bride is making her floral selections for the wedding with her florist, she should select one flower from her bouquet for the groom’s boutonniere.  A smaller flower will suit the groom much more appropriately than a larger flower.