BBQ – Difficult Foods

I recently attended a pig roast where many different types of barbecued foods, such as ribs, chicken wings, and hot dogs, were served.  My job title of etiquette consultant must have intimidated many of the guests, because when the time came to eat, they all waited to see how I was going to eat the barbecued feast.

A barbecue is an informal affair.  Please don’t worry about which fork and knife to use.   Go ahead and use your fingers in lieu of utensils. However, don’t try to imitate a feast of the Medieval time period by picking up a big ole’ turkey leg or steak with your fingers and begin gnawing away on it.  Larger pieces of meat should be cut with a knife and fork.

Even though the use of fingers is allowed at a barbecue, it is still imperative to remember other etiquette skills such as eating with your mouth closed, passing foods rather than reaching across the table, using a napkin rather than licking your fingers, or avoiding the use of a toothpick in public.

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Miss USA 2009 Pageant – 1 Step Forward, 2 Steps Back

As a pageant coach and a former Mrs. Ohio USA title holder, I am constantly working to educate the public that not all beauty contestants are empty minded bombshells.   Gone are the days when questions are answered with canned answers we think the judges want to hear such as, “My favorite color is red, white, and blue”.

Today’s pageant contestants must know who they are, know the issues, and speak up for what they believe in.  Contestants should be judged on how they deliver and support their position on issues, not on whether the judges personally agree or disagree with their positions.

During a live broadcast of the Miss USA Pageant this past Sunday night, Miss California was asked how she felt about gay marriage.  She said she is against it.  Whether or not I agree with her answer, I applaud Miss California for standing up for what she believes and supporting it.  Unfortunately, the camera caught a shot of the judge, Perez Hilton, shaking his head in disbelief after hearing her answer.

Miss California placed as first runner-up to Miss North Carolina at the completion of the competition.  Did her answer place her in that position?  We will never know, but will always wonder.  Miss North Carolina did an outstanding job and had high scores in each area of competition all evening.  She is well deserving of the title and I wish her much success during her reign.

No matter who won that evening, a great disservice was done to all young people watching the pageant.  How will they now decide to answer future pageant, job, or college interview questions?  Will they be true to themselves or did they learn to tell the interviewer what they want to hear just to get the job?

Personally, I will continue to be true to myself, speak my mind and coach others to do the same.  I will also continue to respect the opinions of others whether or not I agree.   Isn’t this what freedom of speech is all about?  Or is your favorite color really red, white, and blue?

Posted in Blogroll, Pageant Tips | 2 Comments

Correspondence Cards

Correspondence cards are used for brief hand-written messages including thank-you notes.  These cards are made of a heavy card stock and measure approximately 4″ x 6″.

The executive’s name only is printed at the top of the card:

Frederick S. Harris

The executive’s name and business address appear on the back flap of the envelope:

Frederick S. Harris
915 Fulton Street, Suite 271
Columbus, Ohio 43215
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Seating of Guests at a Traditional Wedding Ceremony

As guests are escorted by ushers down the aisle at a traditional church wedding,  guests of the bride are seated on the left side of the aisle as you face the alter and guests of the groom are seated on the right side of the aisle.

Posted in Etiquette Tips, Wedding Etiquette | 2 Comments

Slurping Spaghetti – Observed Etiquette Faux Pas

A mother in a restaurant was teaching her daughter how to slurp individual spaghetti noodles into her mouth with all the appropriate sound effects.   It wasn’t at all as adorable as the scene from “Lady and the Tramp”.  In fact, it made this lady look like a tramp.

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Shaking Hands When The Person Is Not Seated Next To You

We are frequently introduced to others who are not sitting immediately next to us.  It occurs at events such as luncheons, board meetings and social occasions.

Under no circumstance should you reach across the table in front of someone to shake hands.  Instead, stand up and extend your hand to the individual you are being introduced to reaching behind the backs of others sitting at the table.

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First Dates – Can You Hear Your Date?

First dates can be awkward because you typically don’t know your date very well and want to make a good impression.

Communication is very important to a first date.  Make sure you select a location that allows you to easily hear each other.  Visiting a local bar with a loud band or attending a rock concert would not be a good choice for a first date because it would be difficult to have a conversation in either situation.

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Setting An Example For Children

Children are like sponges.  They absorb everything.  Be very careful with the information you provide for them to absorb.

Be on your best behavior at all times around children.  They learn by mimicking everything adults do and say.

The rule of “do as I say, not as I do,” does not apply here because you’re sending a mixed message.

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Signing Childrens Names to Greeting Cards and Correspondence

It is an acceptable practice to sign the names of children on greeting cards and other informal forms of correspondence sent by a family.

However, it is not appropriate to sign the names of adult or married children to any form of correspondence.  At this point in their lives, they should take on the responsibility of sending their own cards and correspondence.

Mothers, no matter how much you want to continue to include the entire family in your affairs, you must let go at some point.   I was recently most humiliated for my mother-in-law when she signed both of her son’s and spouse’s names to a sympathy card sent to the father of my best friend without my knowledge.   Luckily, the recipients realized she did  not understand what she had done, but it still placed her children in an awkward position.

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What color corsage should I get for my prom date?

Dear Sandy,

My prom date told me her gown is green with black trim.  What color corsage should I get for her?  I like red roses, but don’t want her to look like a christmas tree in green and red.   I’m afraid I’ll make a big mistake.  Please help me!

TJ, Dayton, Ohio

Dear TJ,

Rather than trying to match a flower with your date’s gown, give her a corsage with white flowers.  Roses come in white as well as carnations and several other flowers.

Sincerely,

Sandy Hyde

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